Alphabet of Manliness (revised and updated)

Maddox

Aug 2009 · Kensington Publishing Corp.

About this ebook

 The hilarious New York Times–bestselling parody guide to all things alpha male, now revised and updated.

Sometimes in life you say certain words in conjunction with other words that you normally wouldn’t, such as the word “holy” and the word “shit.” Those times are rare and celebrated. Well, get your face hole ready, because this is one of those times: introducing The Alphabet of Manliness: Special Edition!

If it’s a crime to be awesome, then I deserve three life sentences and the death penalty. This literary kick to the dick may very well be the greatest compilation of all things manly throughout history.

I, Maddox, the author, personally guarantee that this is the best edition of the book since the last one. This book is only for the saltiest, hairiest, most rugged sons of bitches out there. However, it would be selfish to keep it for myself, so feel free to pick up a copy. This humble tome of wisdom is a tribute to all men who toil away at work every day, getting their balls busted or busting balls alike.

If you can’t handle the punch to the colon I'm about to deliver to you, look on the bright side: you'll save a fortune on Halloween when kids come to your door to pick apart your candy ass. On the other hand, if you feel comfortable with the risk of having your ass neatly packaged and handed to you with all the trimmings, cut the foreplay and crack the book open already.

The new edition includes:

•“The Numbers of Manliness”

•A full-color insert

•Corrections to typos!

Ratings and reviews

I used to think this book was hilarious. After revisiting it, I am buying a one way ticket to Greenland to contemplate my life decisions as I watch the peaceful sunset of Maddox's career. I don't know what I used to find funny about this book, and rereading it makes it painfully obvious why Maddox lost The Dumbest Lawsuit in the Universe. I'm really trying to believe that Turkey was wrong about Armenians, but people like the author of this book really make me wonder.

DGZ8888888888drkk:rmdffdrtttgggggytttttt5 the most important part is to get a job in your business to say that the world has no way in a way in a very good manner in the past but the most beautiful things you don't do are the world of a lot and very well out anfffffgd and very well done with it and not a big fan in your life of your life of course and very well worth the time and money that is the most important factor to me to get a the idea on how I should do it up and not the other side that you are 3rd or something you want me too much love for a long weekend or more than I have ever seen and very well worth my head and not a good 3 of your time in my mind about the best way for 7days in your heart for that and not a very good one to me to say the future and not a good relationship and I am sure that I will get to be good with you and your home as an employee at a high school level in your life and you will not just be good friends with us and very well you 50th are doing it up and

This book is classic Maddox. If you love to have a good laugh I recommend this book

About the author

Maddox is a native Utahn and the visionary author of The Best Page in the Universe. Once a lowly programmer for a telemarketing company, he now stands as a specimen of sheer masculinity and chiseled good looks. When he’s not found writing his own biographies in the third person, he can be found writing articles for his website at thebestpageintheuniverse.com.