The Happy Sleeper: The Science-Backed Guide to Helping Your Baby Get a Good Night's Sleep-Newborn to School Age

Heather Turgeon, MFT · Julie Wright, MFT

Dec 2014 · Sold by Penguin

About this ebook

UPDATED IN 2024. An urgent message for sleep-deprived parents: You don't have to suffer through "cry-it-out" OR attachment parenting's "co-sleeping." There's another way! 
 
Parents spend a great deal of time and energy coaxing, negotiating, singing, and swinging their children to sleep. Yet studies show that sleep deprivation among young kids is rampant. Babies and young children get an average of 9.5 hours of rest per night when experts agree that they need 11-12 hours. A mountain of research links drowsiness to academic, health, and psychological problems. It turns out that over time, all that cajoling and soothing can actually have the opposite of its desired effect. The harder we try (with the best of intentions and boatloads of love), the more we get in the way of our kids' natural sleep development.
 
The Happy Sleeper shows parents how to avoid and undo cumbersome sleep habits, putting their babies and little kids on track to a full night's sleep. Heather Turgeon, a columnist for Babble.com and writer for the National Sleep Foundation, and Julie Wright, a psychotherapist and highly popular parenting expert, teach parents that babies have an innate capacity to self-soothe, as well as the brain machinery to sleep well. So why do many families struggle at night? Most do what works today, but don't notice when it's no longer needed tomorrow, and then push harder when it becomes a hindrance the day after that. Parents get stuck working overtime with fanfare and tricks to put their babies and children to bed--lying down with their kids, re-tucking and refilling water glasses endlessly. Mindfulness--the practice of using focused attention, being present and open--has proven effective in many realms of health and serves as the foundation for the techniques in this book. Using these methods in a thoughtful, attuned, and loving way, parents transfer the role of soothing from themselves to the children.
 
The Happy Sleeper features a foreword by neuropsychiatrist and popular parenting expert Dr. Daniel Siegel, author of Parenting from the Inside Out and the New York Times bestseller Brainstorm.

Ratings and reviews

I usually don't write reviews, but I felt I needed to spread the word of this invaluable tool. I found The Happy Sleeper when I was transitioning my 4 and almost 2 Y old daughters into their own beds. I had been cosleeping with them and nursing my younger daughter to sleep. I am very much into attachment based parenting, so knew when it came to transition them into their own beds that I couldn't do the cry it out method. The reverse sleep wave method worked like magic for my girls initially. I couldn't believe it! It was hard for maybe 2 nights and then very shortly my daughters were sleeping through the night easily and so was I! When we hit a hiccup because my parents didn't follow the routine and my younger daughter was having a hard time, I loved that I could email the authors, heard back within the same day, and could set up a consult call that actually fixed the problem! My daughters are 4 and 6 and still have healthy sleep habits. I also have a 19 month old. So when I saw their online class for only $40, I took it hoping it would be a good refresher. Julie and Heather did not disappoint! It was a great refresher and helped me even further understand ways attachment is being woven into this easy method. Again when I reached out about night weaning, I got a response within hours! We have started the sleep wave technique with my youngest. The first night was hard as expected, the second night my daughter went to bed quickly and slept great! I have recommended this book to several friends who report the same success. One tip that they say and was helpful for us, really let the more confident parent handle the wave. My husband was not as emotional about it all like I was. I think him going in saying the words and putting them back to bed helped the process!

Highly recommend this book for parents wanting to sleep train their baby, even before they are 4 months. It's a great book that validated what we were already doing with our baby, which I chose to read when I was thinking of getting her to start falling asleeo independently at around 3.5 months. We tweaked our method slightly according to the information/advice provided in the book (around the 'Sleep Wave' method) and we managed to sleep train our baby by four months and she was sleeping through the night. So much so that when the dreaded fourth month sleep regression came about sometime when she was about 4.5 months old, it only affected our baby's daytime naps and lasted for a few days - she very soon returned to self-soothing once she got over the hump. The next test will be using the methods in the book for when we move baby into her own room but I have every confidence that we will be successful and it will be a relatively easy transition if we follow the book's guidance.

The Happy Sleeper is an absolute MUST for parents and caregivers. It’s a loving and effective approach for getting your little ones to sleep soundly, enjoy the comfort of their own space and be confident in self-soothing. I have used this book with my daughter and son and have found it to be reassuring, educational and intuitive. I recommend purchasing the book so that you can continue to reference it whenever you need to! Thank you, Julie and Heather!! You are so friendly and accessible and I would follow your input on any and every childhood development subject.

About the author

Heather Turgeon, MFT, is a psychotherapist, a science columnist for the popular online parenting magazine Babble, and a writer for the National Sleep Foundation.
 
Julie Wright, MFT, is one of Los Angeles’s best-known parenting group leaders. She has taught thousands of moms about sleep and mindfulness in her popular Wright Mommy and Me groups at the celebrated Pump Station & Nurtury.

Heather Turgeon, MFT, is a psychotherapist who writes about child development and parenting. Her writing has appeared in the popular online parenting magazine Babble (as the long-running Science of Kids column), Salon, The Daily Beast, and others. She has covered the topic of sleep for many outlets and is a science writer for the National Sleep Foundation. Heather lives in Los Angeles with her husband and two little ones--both of whom are happy sleepers.
 
Julie Wright, MFT is one of Los Angeles’s best known parenting group leaders and has taught thousands of moms in her popular Wright Mommy and Me groups at the celebrated Pump Station & Nurtury. Julie is a psychotherapist whose work focuses on empathic, mindful parenting, attachment, and sleep. Julie lives in Los Angeles with her son and visits her east coast family often.